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5 Qualities Your Husband Finds Irresistible
Building on these five traits will ensure you have a healthy and happy husband at home.
If you asked 100 men what they look for in a woman, you may get 100 different answers. Some men like blondes. Some like brunettes. Some like tall, willowy women. Others like short ladies. Yet if you ask a man thatís married what he finds important in his wife, an important trend emerges.
Being in a marriage with a woman who's beautiful doesn't mean much to a man if his wife is rude, selfish or demanding. Often, women forget that men are attracted to who they are and not just what they look like. Good looks may have caught his attention, but who you are on the inside is what will make or break the relationship in the end.
Here are five qualities that inspire a man to stay devoted:
If thereís one trait your husband will value more than anything else in you, itís honesty. That may seem awfully boring, but itís actually huge. Honesty means more to a man than most women realize. Look at it this way: From a guyís perspective, he knew the day you got married you would ultimately have a tremendous amount of power over him. So likewise, if heís going to give you that sort of power, he absolutely must be able to trust you.
As a man, trust is his most valuable gift he can give you (at least in his mind). If you are dishonest, it makes him question whether he can confide in and depend on you. Telling the truth may sometimes be uncomfortable and, at other times, may be hard, but showing your man that he can trust you to be honest with him at all times will do wonders for your marriage.
Weíve all heard the proverb, "Patience is a virtue." Patience is key to a lasting relationship. But what exactly does it mean to be patient, anyway?
Sometimes, women think of patience in terms of being tolerant. That's not what being patient means. Patience means thinking before you speak or act. For example, if you and your husband get into a disagreement, stop and ask yourself this question, "Is this worth fighting about?" If it is, then bring it to his attention immediately. If itís not, be patient with him, hold your tongue, and move on. The little things are worth letting go.
There are definite occasions when you should not tolerate his behavior. If heís unfaithful, abusive, or constantly rude or disrespectful, donít tolerate it from him. This isnít the time to be patient and accept it. If it is worth confronting him about, tell him that you want him to change what heís doing. Give specific examples. If he doesnít change and the issue is vitally important to you, consider seeking out a professional to help. Patience is wonderful when it comes to small things. Let them fly. Yet when it comes to big, harmful things like infidelity, tolerance does much more harm than good. A good man will respect the woman who knows the difference.
Men canít resist a woman who is truly kindhearted. This means so much more than simply being nice to a man. Men measure kindness by how you act when heís done something wrong and heís genuinely sorry. For example, say he missed an important event. He forgot it and is genuinely sorry. Do you forgive him and move on or do you hold a grudge and purposefully "miss" an event that is important to him?
When your husband is feeling vulnerable, do you stick it to him or are you gracious? It is possible to accept his apology while conveying how his action hurt you while still forgiving him and moving on. If heís feeling vulnerable and you donít take advantage of it, heíll be incredibly attracted to you. Men want a woman who is genuinely kind and will stick by his side through thin and thick, good and bad. If you can be that woman for him, your marriage will last a lifetime.
Believe in Him
Thereís nothing sexier to a man than a woman who truly believes in him. In fact, research shows that if you believe in a manís dreams, heíll naturally be more attracted to you. What does this mean? You donít have to show a burning passion for each of his goals and hobbies in life. You donít have to take up an interest in Fantasy Football or golf tournaments. However, if you tell him that you believe he can accomplish anything his heart desires, youíll turn him on in magical ways.
For example, say your husband wants to start his own company someday. It may sound a bit crazy to you, but if thatís his passion, encourage him to do it. When you believe in him, the dream feels real to him. It feels attainable. He wants you to believe in him, and if you do heíll be able to do miraculous things.
Sometimes a bit of motivation and encouragement from you is all he needs to get the ball rolling and shoot for the stars. If you truly pay attention to him and listen to his hopes and dreams and then tell him you have faith he can accomplish those goals without telling him how to do it, youíll create a deep emotional bond and build a strong, lasting marriage.
Expensive: You Set Your Own Value
Here's a secret that most women forgetómen like expensive things. What's more, men actually want you to view yourself as a woman of exceptional value. Some women mistakenly believe this means they are to act in a condescending and aloof manner.
That's not what men consider valuable. Women who know they are valuable are above all, happy with themselves. Developing this quality can be as simple as learning a new habit.
If you feel you're lacking any of these qualities the good news is you can obtain each of them. The secret is to understand a principle that can transform your life and remember that what you do is more important than what you feel.
Here's what it means. If you'll begin practicing the trait you want to acquireóinitially it may feel strange. Yet, if you'll continue practicing these behaviorsówhether good or badóyou'll soon notice a difference in yourself that your husband will notice as well. Given enough time, these new qualities will become a part of you and your spouse will find himself wanting to be around you more often.
Bob Grant, L.P.C. is the author of the bestselling book, "The Woman Men Adore...and Never Want To Leave." For over 20 years his unique insights have helped thousands of singles and couples experience the relationship they have always wanted. Learn about these secrets by visiting him at www.relationshipheadquarters.com.
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