An Introduction Into Sex Toys for Men If you're looking to get something for the guy who has everything, these products can add a little stimulation of eroticism into your marriage. BY WENDY STRGAR
Enhance the eroticism and intimacy in your marriage with a male sex toy.
Even though I spend my days writing and teaching about love and sex, I still find it challenging to delve into the topic of male sex toys. I am not alone in this. For many married couples, just introducing the idea of adding a vibrator into a relationship can sometimes be awkward and challenging. For a long time the only sex toys I sold on my Good Clean Love website were for women. I was first introduced to male sex toys in the midst of adult entertainment trade shows where exhibitionism generally wins out over education. Although I was curious, the common terms like butt plug and cock ring were not easy for me to repeat and didn’t really teach me much about the benefits and uses for the products.
Then, one of my favorite toy companies, Lelo, launched a men’s line. Trusting them as I do as a reliable source for sexual health products, I felt obliged to bring home some samples and test them out on my husband, who surprisingly didn’t take too much convincing. What we discovered in the test process and the research that I did following was that there is as much to learn about male pleasure and the tools to facilitate the job as for women. Many men are as unfamiliar with the extent and complexity of their pleasure anatomy as women are and because archaic associations between toys, anal stimulation and sexual identities still exist, many men still feel like they can’t ask. The idea that the penis shaft and head is the most or only erogenous zone for men is as outdated as the idea of the clitoris being a little button on top of the vagina.
Male sexual pleasure has many layers. The reason that anal stimulation is such a hot topic is that men have a G-spot too, and the anus is the access point. Two very beautiful tools to explore this erogenous zone include Lelo’s new "Bob," as well as the beautiful stainless steel "Njoy" wands, both of which are designed for external and internal use. Learning more about your man’s sexual anatomy and his wide range of pleasure zones will open your lovemaking to very different kinds of arousal and pleasurable sensations that may surprise both of you. Interestingly, the more that I have learned about the male pleasure anatomy, the more I am struck by the similarities between the genders. The same kinds of deep, intense internal orgasm that women find through locating their G-spots are readily available for men.
Working with prostate massagers and identifying how to locate and stimulate this very erogenous area does require a leap of trust for both partners. The multitude of nerve endings in the area between the anus and the scrotum is a revelation for many men, but these sensations respond better to a gentle and patient hand—at least initially. Strong communication skills and a healthy curiosity in your sexual relationship are the keys to discovering this wide range of sensations that will enhance both your enjoyment and connection.
Another boy toy that is worth adding to your love arsenal is the "C-Ring," which is also sometimes referred to as a "P-ring." C-Rings are also frequently referred to as erection rings, which are basically rings that slide over the penis. Most have vibrators attached, and some have a double ring system to fit around both the base of the penis and wrap around the scrotum. These toys are popular because they help many men maintain an erection, because there is a certain amount of blood flow that gets caught in the erect penis and, depending on the use, the scrotum. The vibrating part of the ring can be turned to face behind the scrotum stimulating the nerve rich male perineum or toward the woman, which directly stimulates the clitoris during penetration. Regardless of the location of the vibrating element, the sensation of the penis vibrating inside the vaginal cavity adds a whole new dimension to lovemaking.
The Lelo luxury version of this multi-use toy is the rechargeable "Bo." The medical- grade silicone stretches to truly fit any size and is softer and more supple than the single use models I have come across. Just like their female vibrators, they recharge like a cell phone. It can be used with or without the vibrating attachment. For all penis rings, the standard safety recommendations are to use the products no longer than thirty minutes at a time. Some men have difficulty ejaculating with them on, so removal prior to orgasm makes sense. For other men, orgasm is easy and more exciting with the ring in place.
So if you're wondering what to get the guy who has everything, investing in one of these handsome tools to help your man unlock the keys to a lifetime of pleasure and satisfaction may just hit his spot.
Wendy Strgar is the founder of GoodCleanLove.com, which provides products and advice for sustainable love. If you have questions about products or toys send them in and Wendy will be happy to share her knowledge. When visiting the website, use coupon code NEWSITE08, to enjoy a new year 15 percent discount.