Marriage Minutes: Secret Conversations of Cheaters Revealed; Premarital Experiences Impact Marriage Quality New research shows that the size of your wedding could have an impact on your marriage quality. BY HITCHED EDITORS
A cheating website revealed that wives aren't looking to cheat because they no longer love their husbands.
“ Making time to talk clearly about potential transitions may contribute to better marriages.”
The following is a round-up of news items compiled by the Hitched editors during the week of August 21, 2014.
Wives Who Seek Affairs Usually Still Love Their Husbands
This past weekend at the 109th Annual Meeting of the American Sociological Association in San Francisco, Eric Anderson, a professor at the University of Winchester and Chief Science Officer at Ashley Madison, the website that promotes infidelity, revealed that he has been secretly reading the conversations of women looking for extra-marital partners. In total, he says he looked at over 4,000 conversations from 100 women, and suggests that most wives aren't cheating on their husbands because they no longer love them anymore, but because they desire more sex, passion and know there are opportunities waiting for them online.
Time magazine points out the various conflicts of interest and holes in the process of Anderson's research, but this might be considered pretty good news. Imagine if husbands and wives, instead of searching for ways to destroy their marriage, sought to empower their union by bringing the passion and sexual desire back—if only there were a website that promoted amazing and passionate marriages. Go ahead, check out our Sex channel to get things revving.
The Impact of 3 Premarital Experiences on Marriage Quality
Galena Rhoades, Ph.D., a Research Associate Professor in the Psychology Department at the University of Denver along with Scott Stanley, Ph.D., a senior fellow for both the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia and for the Institute for Family Studies released the "Before 'I Do'" report sponsored by the The National Marriage Project, which found three major conclusions about premarital experiences and their impact on marriage quality down the road.
First, sex before marriage is complicated. Men and women who only slept with their to-be spouse prior to marriage reported higher marital quality than those who had other sexual partners. The researchers noted that sex before marriage won't necessarily doom a marriage, but could be risky according to their findings.
Second, when going through life's milestones together marriages are better when the decisions are made consciously rather than sliding through them without much planning or thought. "Making time to talk clearly about potential transitions may contribute to better marriages," according to the report.
The third and final point some might find surprising. The researchers discovered having more guests at the wedding is associated with higher marital quality. To account for this, the researchers suggest having community support helps your marriage. This held true even when they controlled for outside factors such as income and education, which might allow certain groups to spend more on their wedding.
At the end of the Before "I Do" report, the researchers note that all of these findings are based on choices that couples make and that they have the power to alter outcomes based on their own decisions and actions.